Have you ever been stopped in your marketing tracks because
of procrastination and didn't know where it was coming
from? This happened a few times with some of my private
clients recently, and we noticed that every time, it wasn't
really procrastination, it was a fear of some sort that was
holding them back.
Perhaps you've experienced it too? The fear of reaching out
to people, fear of failure, fear of success, fear of not
doing something right, and the kicker, fear of REJECTION? I
don't think I know anyone who's not experienced some form
of fear of rejection when marketing themselves. I think
it's innate for many of us. Problem is, it holds us back
from doing what it takes to get clients. And it's got to
stop.
Fear of rejection keeps people from marketing, from
networking, from asking for the sale, reaching out, from
getting help, from public speaking, from asking for
referrals, and from collaborating with strategic alliances.
You've heard me say this a thousand times: if you don't
market today, you won't have clients in six months.
So, understanding that there's some sort of fear stopping
you, what do you do about it? I've done a lot of research
on this, for my clients, and for myself over the years.
I've read books, special reports, and anything that was
available on the subject. Problem is that most people just
GLOSS OVER what you should do.
The "experts" talk about changing your mindset, thinking
positively, and all that good stuff. OK, but that's not
practical enough for me. I wanted to know EXACTLY what to
do to eliminate the fears and limiting beliefs that have
held me back in the past, and that I continually see my
clients struggling with.
I've discovered there's more to getting clients than just
the OUTER game of Client Attraction (marketing). There's
also an INNER game of Client Attraction (your mindset and
beliefs) and if you don't deal with the inner part, then
you'll keep doing the same things (and making the same
money) you've been making for years to come. I don't know
about you, but I prefer to continue to grow and make more.
So, I went on an internal search for what the answer was
and I found it. I've worked (and continue to work) on my
personal growth and development, and I've broken it down
into a series of steps that, when done in sequence, help
eliminate the limiting beliefs and fears that hold us back
from marketing (and shining, personally) in a big way.
Here's what you do:
1. Establish the root fear or limiting belief that's
holding you back from marketing. (Fear of success, fear of
failure, fear of rejection, fear of overwhelm, fear of what
others will think of you, fear of doing it wrong, fear of
asking for what you want, fear of saying no to someone,
etc.) Let's pick fear of rejection, just for argument's
sake, since it's such a biggie with my clients.
2. Think back to your childhood. What is the earliest
memory you have of being rejected? Write it down. (I'm
serious, don't just read this assignment, write it down.
That's how you get results.) If you get stuck, then go back
to what the original thought that popped up when you read
the assignment. That's usually the big one that needs to be
addressed first, even if you don't think it is.
3. Write down ALL the events in life in which you can
remember feeling rejected (your parents, kids in grade
school, high school, the dating years, cheerleading or
sports tryouts, the working world, and of course, since
being self-employed).
4. Now, think about what MEANING you created about
yourself as a result of each of those incidents. ("I'm not
good enough," "I'm dumb," "I'll never be good at
marketing," "When I reach out, I get rejected," "I'm not
cut out to make a lot of money," etc. Really spend some
time on this, because that's where the healing begins. Be a
hard grader.
5. Then, make a separate list of how these MEANINGS you
created have stopped you in life. Did you stop reaching
out? Did you stop taking chances? Did you retreat into a
hole? Did you hold back from taking advantage of
opportunities that could have advanced you? Write them all
down.
6. Now, go back to the list of meanings you created and
ask yourself, "What if what I THINK happened wasn't
actually the case?" Here's what I mean: If you were
rejected by your "crush" in high school after telling this
person you liked him, imagine other scenarios other than
"I'm unattractive" or "I'm not lovable." Could they have
secretly been dating someone else? Could they have been shy
and not known what to say? Could they even have been
interested in someone their own gender? Write it ALL down.
7. This is a list of ALTERNATIVE reasons why they wouldn't
have done the 'right' thing by you, rather than thinking
you were unattractive or unlovable. Now, look at this list
and pick one, because I'll guarantee you, what you THINK
happened is probably not what happened. Each person has
their own writing on the wall and even if they said or did
something unacceptable, we don't REALLY know what that
reason was (we might never know what was going on for them
at that time).
8. Reevaluate the limiting belief or your fear. Is it
REALLY true that you were rejected? Could there have been
another reason for what happened? Is it really WORTH your
still being affected by this and having lost out on
opportunities your whole life because of what one (dumb)
person said or did? Is that event really WORTH you being
stopped in your marketing now?
9. Decide to select the ALTERNATIVE reason for what
happened and move past the fear. You deserve to not be
stuck in your tracks any more. You deserve to be free from
what others said or did to you in the past. You deserve to
be successful and that's what I want for you.
10. If you can't seem to let the fear go, then just FEEL
the fear, and do what it takes anyway. You've heard the
saying: "Successful people feel the fear too and they do
what it takes anyway." That's been my experience. When I
feel myself getting stopped, I often use the process above,
and then I just push through and get things done. Funny
thing is, it's never as bad as what I had feared. Best of
all, every time you push through a fear that stops you, you
exercise that muscle. After a while, limiting fears or
beliefs don't have a chance against you.
YOUR CLIENT ATTRACTION ASSIGNMENT:
Make a point to do the exercise above. Take an afternoon or
an hour, and really work through what's stopping you. It
can seem scary at first, but I assure you, when you
actually do it, it becomes easy. And it feels so FREEING at
the end.
You'll notice that you will start DOING more than before,
taking advantage of opportunities, and getting better
results in marketing. That immediately equals more paying
clients, more results, and in my experience, financial
freedom and being able to live the life you really want. I
once read that the view from the other side of fear is
SUCCESS. Are you game?
Now, if you clear the fears and still are not sure what to
do to get clients in a way that feels easy and authentic to
you, it's time to start doing things differently.
----------------------------------------------------
The Client Attraction Home Study System™ avoids the "Bright
Shiny Object Syndrome" and instead gives you the most
important things to do to set up simple, solid marketing
systems, so that you consistently fill your pipeline and
continually get new clients.All the tools, scripts,
templates, and examples are handed to you on a silver
platter. Easy. You can get it at
http://TheClientAttractionSystem.com
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