When I speak to women I meet at events and even talk with
my clients about how they could raise their profile, I am
always struck by how vital women consider the process of
networking. While most women will recognise it is a
potential boon to their careers, some do not embrace it as
readily as others -perhaps out of shyness or an unhelpful
assumption that you network only to sell...or hand out
business cards indiscriminately in a rapid,
take-no-prisoners, machine-gun style.
It is this image that often puts women off - the idea of
wearing a stiff suit, shaking hands endlessly and trying to
deliver an interesting "elevator speech" whilst the person
you speak to looks over your shoulder. The most successful
networkers I know say very little about themselves
initially and are much more curious about helping others -
this is an approach that has far better results in the long
run, but also is one that comes much more naturally to
women who don't like "tooting their own horn" and are happy
to let a relationship grow.
Also think carefully about what you want from a network.
Are you looking for a new job, a mentor, good contacts of
suppliers, a change of industry, somewhere to hear
inspiring speakers - or what I find many women who come to
my workshops want in the first instance - just a chance to
be around other women who are also working in
male-dominated fields.
The difficulty with networking can come in the self-
imposed pressure to make a sale at the first event you go
to. I used to put enormous pressure on myself when I first
started out, assuming that if no one asked me for
one-to-one coaching on the spot, I had failed. When I look
back, I see how ridiculous that is - especially in the
realm of coaching where most clients feel that they need to
know me better before delving into more personal territory.
It was only when I began to compare networking with that
great British pastime, gardening that I began to be easier
on myself. First, plant your seeds. In this case, begin to
attend events regularly and get to know people and what
they do. Next, choose the best plants for your gardens,
those that will give you the most bang for your buck. When
you first start out, go to a wide variety of networks to
get a feel for what they have to offer and who attends. For
example, when I first set up business, I used to attend
lots of events all over London and Cambridgeshire. It was
only after I began to whittle down to the few that had the
best buds (in gardening parlance) that I was able to become
more heavily involved in and to reap the benefits of
belonging to just a few groups. Marketers will tell you
people need to be exposed to a new product (in this case -
you) seven times before they make a decision to buy. It is
unrealistic to think you can do this with more than just a
few organisations on your first attempts.
Top Tips for Networking like a Gardener
* It is far better to attend 1-3 networks religiously than
keep up with more on a haphazard basis. Regularly attending
network events will help you build a rapport with the
group, making new introductions easier.
* Water your plants: You can't leave the garden unattended
and expect to reap big juicy vegetables months later.
Water" by being helpful to people - again a strength most
women I know already have. If they were in need of a
service of someone you know, a bookkeeper, virtual
assistant or colleague - pass on their details, as making
links is one of the quickest ways to make yourself valuable.
* Send an e-mail to those you met saying how much you
enjoyed talking with them and include specific references
to your conversation. Do not send generic emails to
everyone. They can feel soulless and impersonal - not the
message you want to send.
* Make yourself of use to them. Send links to articles
they may be interested in or invite them to other events
that they may enjoy. Make a referral for a service that
they said they need. It is usually after a few months of
contact, bumping into them at other events and infrequently
exchanged e-mails that people will respond
* Niche down to those you networks you truly enjoy, attend
regularly, be of use to others and you will begin to see
dividends.
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