The topic of ownership seems to be a hot topic in recent
coaching and other conversations. Specifically, what you
own or are responsible for and what you are not.
In this area, I find very little middle ground. There are
those of you who choose to own everything means that you
feel responsible for what happens around you in most
directions. And then there are those of you who feel no
sense of ownership, irrespective of what those around you
desire. Both sides are equally frustrating to the other.
Here's what taking on too much ownership looks like:
As a Leader: You solve everyone's problems rather than
encouraging them to come up with their own unique
solutions. While this may be the easiest approach, it in
no way enhances the growth and creativity of your staff.
As a Service Provider or Sales Executive: You assume what
your customer wants, wearing yourself out to please or take
care of their every need. Simple questions could prevent
hours of unnecessary labor and annoyance.
As a Parent: Your children's challenges become yours. As
with the Leader, you take on the responsibility rather than
teaching your children the value of finding their own
resolutions to normal childhood predicaments. What does
this teach your kids about responsibility? What type of
adults are you forming?
As a Spouse, Partner or Friend: You take on ownership
practically before a problem occurs. Anyone comes to you
with a dilemma, and you immediately leap forward with the
perfect solution. How does that honor the other individual?
What if you instead asked more questions and persuaded
those closest to you to come up with creative approaches?
Your relationship would be more balanced and they would
unfold self-sufficiency.
You can see challenges with each of these scenarios and how
each blocks a successful outcome. The opposite is equally
debilitating.
When you take too little ownership:
As a leader: Few individuals who avoid ownership become
leaders, yet some slip through. Your focus is on the
problem rather than the solution. You doubt yourself, so
ask for others opinions to the point of exhaustion.
As a Service Provider or Sales Executive: Again, it's
always someone else's fault, or the market, weather, etc.
This is no way to learn. Others are succeeding where you
may be failing. Learn what they are doing differently or
more effectively, ask your client or customer what you
could have done better. Be realistic where you were not in
your best mode and find a way to improve. This is your
constant goal.
As a Parent: Sadly enough, you may believe that any
dilemmas that arise are your children's fault and that it
has nothing to do with you. You are thus teaching them
blame, instead of responsibility. Take a look in the
mirror as your children are more often than not emulating
their parents. Where are you sabotaging their development?
The answer is probably the same way you sabotage your own
development.
As a Spouse, Partner or Friend: You are not dependable,
most likely the type of partner that cancels plans at the
last minute, doesn't commit, or is wishy-washy. Since
those who don't easily take ownership for their actions
find solace in being surrounded by similar beings you may
not even notice the lack of depth or dependability in your
relationships.
The key to ownership is be conscious and not in autopilot.
There are times you might consciously choose to be
responsible, and there are times when it's best to share or
delegate the responsibility. You may take on more
responsibility in certain areas than in others.
Just because you are a responsible person doesn't mean that
you take on the ultimate responsibility in all aspects of
life. This is exhausting, and prevents those around you
from growing. And hopefully, no sense of ownership is no
longer an option for you. Enjoy your discoveries and make
wise ownership choices this week.
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For the sake of keeping your career fresh and on track,
would you like to enjoy a weekly shot-in-the-arm from
Master Certified Coach Ann Golden Eglé? You can sign up
for her Success Thought of the Week at
http://www.gvsuccesscoaching.com .
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