There are several similarities between dating and
interviewing. Observing two scenarios - Bob's blind date
and Judy's first interview demonstrates some behaviors in
either situation that are positive and negative. Imagine
Bob in the interviewer role in the blind date situation and
Jane as the candidate in the job scenario.
1. Before the interview thinking
Bob: "I really need someone in my life and I am willing to
take anyone who is a warm body."
Jane: "I really need a job - I'm so desperate, I'll take
anything."
"Desperation vibes" can be spotted at first site. Avoided
by staying focused on the experience and not the result.
2. The first impression - chemistry
Bob feels the connection with his date - "She is exactly
what I have been looking for."
Jane gets a negative feeling from the interviewer - stiff
and formal.
Chemistry is felt and an opinion is formed in the first few
minutes of a meeting, based on appearance, and body
language.
3. Getting to know each other
Bob watches and listens intently to confirm his first
opinion of his date.
Jane can feel the interview turning around as she answers
the questions with specific examples of her past successes.
First impressions are not always the final ones. Both
processes are conversations to learn if there is a match.
4. Questions - similarities, differences, values, qualities
Bob has a million questions he wants to ask. "Do you like
music, dancing, movies? Italian food?"
Jane is asked if she has questions. She answers, "No, I
think you've covered the basics."
You need information to decide whether to take this
relationship to the next level.
5. Past experiences stories
Bob is learning about his date by the stories she is
telling about her past experiences.
Jane gives specific examples of her past work, letting the
interviewer know she had similar experiences.
Stories are the proof that you have "been there and done
that." Stories reveal patterns.
6. Red lights blinking warning!
Bob's date begins to talk about her ex-boyfriend in a
negative way.
Jane left her last job because of her boss. She avoids
saying anything negative.
On a date, or in an interview, it is best not to bad-mouth
former relationships.
7. Introduction to the "family"
Bob is excited about introducing his date to friends and
family.
Jane is given a tour and introduced to potential peers.
The next level is to meet the other members - friends,
family, co-workers. Don't under-estimate the impact of
"third party" feedback.
8. The competition
Bob continues observes his date and mentally compares her
with others.
Jane is told that there are five candidates for the job.
She starts to panic, thinking that all the other candidates
are probably more qualified than she is.
Faulty thinking about the competition is a mistake. You are
unique and should be able to convey your strengths and
positive qualities.
9. The call back - the waiting
Bob says he will phone about another date.
The interviewer tells Jane that the hiring decision will be
made next week.
Waiting for a call is one of the most difficult parts of
either process. Trust in the process and let whatever is
going to happen occur.
10. The offer/commitment
Bob calls for a second date and she accepts. Time will tell
whether that original spark will continue or fizzle.
Jane waits two weeks for her call back. She is offered the
position and accepts.
Not every date will end in a commitment or even a second
date. Not every interview will end in a job offer.
Sometimes it just doesn't work - for whatever reason. Let
go and move forward.
There will be other dates and other interviews.
----------------------------------------------------
Carole Martin is a celebrated author, trainer, and mentor.
Carole can give you interviewing tips like no one else can.
Try her practice interview and pick up a copy of her FREE
9-part "Interview Success Tips" report by visiting Carole
on the web at http://www.interviewcoach.com
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