Coaching Skills Training: Coaching and Sexuality

Coaching Skills Training: Coaching and Sexuality
When I train managers as coaches I always warn them to
respect the power of coaching questions and to recognize
the possibility that what starts as an innocuous, business
related conversation, may lead to the unveiling of a deeper
issue. Coaching managers would be advised to develop at
least a little psychological awareness. Consider for
example, society's changing attitudes and practices with
regard to sexual activity.

Let's firstly consider the pioneering work of some of the
early writers and researchers in the field.

Havelock Ellis, working in the Victorian era, wrote mainly
concerning the need to understand the sex lives of 'normal'
people, as opposed to so called deviants. Also writing at
this time was Sigmund Freud, perhaps the most well known of
all psychoanalysts, whose albeit controversial theories of
human sexuality are still prevalent today.

Alfred Kinsey is credited with bringing scientific research
methods and objectivity to the field, whilst the
groundbreaking work of Masters and Johnston in the 1970's
precipitated the birth of the sex therapy industry.

Let's now go on to look at the more common 'abnormal'
sexual practices:

Transsexualism

It is important to note that transsexuals do not simply
seek gratification by dressing like the opposite sex
(transvestism); they believe that they are actually members
of the opposite sex trapped as it were, in the wrong body.

Paedophilia

Predominantly male, and generally attracted to the opposite
sex, paedophiles desire sexual gratification with a
prepubescent child. Of all the sexual deviancies,
paedophilia is understandably the most widely condemned
because the 'between consenting adults' argument can never
be made.

Sadism & Masochism

Sadists enjoy domination and achieve sexual arousal through
inflicting real pain on their partner, who may or may not
submit willingly to it, whereas masochists enjoy
submissiveness and often enjoy being humiliated and hurt by
their sexual partners.

Fetishism

A fetish is a sexual obsession with inanimate objects,
typically female clothing, and fetishists can become
aroused by the seemingly bizarre. Consider the real-life
case of a man arrested after being discovered trying to
make love to a paving stone.

There is also:

Transvestism, i.e. cross dressing, Exhibitionism, commonly
known as 'flashing' and Voyeurism, i.e. being a peeping tom

With the obvious exception of Paedophilia, society's
attitudes towards these practices are softening as long as
no real harm comes to people who would prefer not to be
involved. As I write, there is a television programme
featuring a team of dating experts trying to assist a gay
man in finding a relationship. Perhaps as little as 5 years
ago such a programme would not have been made.

What then of the coaching manager who uncovers signs that
these considerations may be causing problems at work? Best
advice would seem to be to keep to good coaching
principles. Ask questions designed to raise awareness,
generate responsibility and build trust then listen
carefully and attentively to the responses. This is highly
unlikely to make things worse and may actually do quite a
lot of good.

After that, it's a question of referring the coachee to the
relevant professional. For this reason I recommend that all
coaching managers familiarize themselves with their
organization's welfare procedure.

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Matt Somers is a coaching practitioner of many years'
experience. He works with a host of clients in North East
England where his firm is based and throughout the UK and
Europe. Matt understands that people are working with their
true potential locked away. He shows how coaching provides
a simple yet elegant key to this lock. His popular
mini-guide "Coaching for an Easier Life" is available FREE
at http://www.mattsomers.com

Think you're too old to work in a War Zone?

Think you're too old to work in a War Zone?
Think you're too old to work in a War Zone? Consider it a
place for young people?

Fear not, plenty of contracting jobs exist for young and
old alike. Depending on your skill set, you may find the
perfect job to enhance that badly needed retirement fund or
even jump start your retirement by several years. Working a
year or so in Afghanistan or Iraq could certainly help you
do that.

With the lucrative salaries that can be made, many people
of all ages are accepting positions in the Mideast, (okay
War Zones) for the big bucks. Numerous positions still
exist and many skill sets are needed from entry level
clerks to highly skilled engineers.

I've traveled throughout the MidEast over the past several
years and have met many people, middle aged and up working
in a variety of positions. People in their 50's, 60's and
yes, 70's working in a War Zone.

Contract positions are available throughout the MidEast,
but the most lucrative by far, are located in a War Zone
such as Iraq and Afghanistan. In addition to your base
salary and overtime, you may be authorized hazard duty pay,
post differential and foreign service pay. These allowances
add up and are often calculated on your base salary. Thus,
the higher your base salary, the higher will be your other
entitlements. Many people often exceed $10,458 every two
weeks. This makes for a very lucrative year.

The majority of these positions are located within the
secure perimeters of military installations. One time I met
an elderly woman who worked in the vehicle dispatch office
at Camp Liberty in Baghdad. One of the nicest and happy go
lucky people I've ever met. Her goal was to complete two
years and then retire.

The basic requirements to work in one of these positions,
is to be able to pass a basic fitness examination and able
to carry your own personal protective gear when needed.
This refers to the typical flak vest and combat helmet
which is required to be worn at times on site and when
traveling between locations.

The method of travel between sites is typically by
helicopter or convoy, riding in armored vehicles or a
"Rhino" which looks like a big armored RV. In either case
you would be expected to travel wearing your vest and
helmet.

Other than the inconvenience of the travel, most people get
accustomed to the environment and try and limit travel to
as little as necessary. With thousands of other contractors
in the region, most quickly adapt.

Regardless of your skill set, many opportunities exist for
people of all ages. If you are considering such an
endeavor, you'll find jobs throughout the region and will
work with dedicated professionals in both the military and
civilian fields.

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Alan Nelson is editor and publisher of the Mideast
Contracting Newsletter. To learn about the many lucrative
opportunities in the Mideast, visit:
http://www.mideastcontracting.com

Five Tips for Improving Small Business Cash Flow

Five Tips for Improving Small Business Cash Flow
Are your small business cash flows tight? Do you sometimes
find yourself juggling bills or negotiating for early
payments from customers? You may want to consider trying
these five, sure-fire tips for improving your cash flow:

Tip #1: Invoice Often and Quickly

Perhaps the easiest thing you can do is quickly invoice
customers or clients. Invoicing more quickly means not only
that you get paid more quickly. But invoicing as soon as
you've shipped a product or provided a service often means
you collect more money.

For services, for example, you'll typically find it easier
to bill more for a service if the customer or client still
remembers all the details of your service. Wait a few
weeks, however, and the customer may have forgotten about
the extra work you did or the special service you provided.

Tip #2: Ask for Deposits

Especially if you're working with new customers or clients,
you may want to consider getting an upfront deposit before
beginning work, shipping product, or investing time.

Deposits deliver several cash flow benefits. They get you
part of your payment up front obviously. Upfront deposits
also tend to reduce your bad debts--if only because they
force you to discuss pricing and costs in the beginning.
Finally, deposits tend to scare away bad clients and
customers--the kind of people who only hurt your cash flow
in the long run anyway.

Tip #3: Fire Bad Customers, Vendors and Employees

The subject of bad customers and clients brings up another
cash flow improvement tip.

Almost surely, you've got unprofitable customers, vendors
and employees. By firing these people, you will improve
your cash flow in the long run. You may even improve your
cash flow in the short run.

Think about this.

Tip #4: Reconcile Your Bank Accounts and Implement Other
Internal Controls

You want to know something weird? Small businesses are
regularly victims of employee, customer and vendor theft.
You can't really stop people from trying to steal from you.
But you can do things that let you spot the slime balls
earlier and make their theft more difficult to accomplish.

One of the most important things you should do in this
regard is reconcile your bank account. With accounting
software programs and online banking, the process shouldn't
take more than about thirty minutes a month in many cases.

If you resell inventory, you may also want to reconcile
regularly your accounting records for your most valuable
inventory items with actual physical counts.

Tip #5: Make Sure Products & Services Are Really Profitable

One final point is worth making. As a general rule, small
businesses deliver high rates of return on the owner
capital invested in the business. Probably about 40% on
average. That means, when you stop to think about, that a
small business that's working right should be generating
plenty of cash flow. Enough to pay vendors, employees,
banks and--yes--you.

Now of course even a healthy business sees its cash flows
ebb and flow. But if you're chronically challenged by your
business cash flows, you maybe don't have a cash flow
problem. Rather, your cash flow issues may be symptomatic
of inadequate profit on the products and services you sell.

In this case, what you may need to do re-engineer your
business model so it's more profitable. Once your business
does become more profitable, you should find your cash flow
troubles disappearing.

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Small business CPA Stephen L. Nelson is the author of
QuickBooks for Dummies. He also edits the popular
http://www.llcsexplained.com and
http://www.scorporationsexplained.com web sites.

What You Need To Get Your Small Business Up And Running

What You Need To Get Your Small Business Up And Running
There is nothing quite as thrilling as starting your own
small business. It is a time where you are finally on your
own and do not have to take orders any longer. You can
start a business doing whatever you want and take it in
whatever direction you choose to. But there are some
things you must do to start the online small business on
the right foot.

Research is absolutely essential when it comes to starting
a small business. Without research you will not know
exactly what has public demand and what is too competitive.
Entering a niche that is extremely competitive is only
going to set you up for failure. But of course you want to
get involved with a business that has public interest and
demand.

Once you have researched the market, plot out exactly how
you want your business to go. This includes goals, when
you want to achieve these goals by, how you intend to
promote the business, what products you are going to sell,
and where you want to take the business. You will learn
that your plan will change as the internet constantly
evolves, but having an initial plan can pave the way to
success.

Now that the plan is set, it is time to get the online
small business up and rolling. First thing you need to do
is get a domain name and hosting company. This will allow
you to have a web site running live for customers to come
to. Then it is time to begin developing your site.

When it comes to developing your site, there are two main
things you must focus on; the content and the design.
Within the content, you want to have fresh and enticing
content that nobody has touched on yet. You can determine
what people are looking for by researching in the search
engines. This way you can take what people want and give
it to them.

To keep people at your web site, you want to have a
visually appealing design. There is nothing that turns
visitors away more than a poorly designed site. Make the
site appealing without going overboard. Try to create a
balance between your content and graphics as well.

The last thing you need to get your small business started
right is an effective marketing plan. You want to begin
marketing as soon as possible. The quicker you begin
marketing, the quicker you can begin generating traffic.
There are free methods such as article writing, posting in
forums and posting in a blog, or paid methods such as
putting up a banner on someone else's site or paying to
climb up the search engines. Whatever methods you choose,
do it right away.

It can be stressful starting a small business because of
the amount of work needed. But once the site is up and
running, it is smooth sailing from there. You can focus on
promoting the site, adding fresh content, and generating a
high income.

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